There is a difference between misunderstanding and not understanding.

And there is a difference between knowing a lot and applying intelligence.

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Almost four months ago, I broke my brain. Fundamentally. No idea where I was or what I was doing and no capacity to perform even basic functions like find clothes to wear or make a cup of coffee. This is the true story of why I think it broke and how I made it work again.

Being me, I decided it was an like a mechanical problem and that's solved with logic. I made a plan - an extremely simple plan because I couldn't remember even a simple exercise routine long enough to do it once, never mind repeatedly. I worked out a very simplistic analogy to describe to myself which parts of my brain were working and which were not working at all or not working properly.

I couldn't string a sentence together, much less a paragraph and I couldn't hold a conversation or read and comprehend anything more than a few lines long.

And so I learned to fake it, then to rebuild the intellect upon which I depend. What I found on the way is perhaps surprising and it's a warning for all.

It happened to me: it could happen to you.

I have held long and hard arguments with myself over something (not the graphic); I have consulted colleagues and friends. It is a significant should I/shouldn't I question.

The consensus is that I should publish a book. Some even said I should publish the first draft with the errors that demonstrate the scale of what I was dealing with when trying to work. (Nope: I've deleted all of those).

I still worry that publishing will diminish how people view me today. And I've concluded that if it does, it says more about them than it does about me. Publish and (maybe) be damned....

The cover was inspired by a comment by one of those I consulted.
 

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Contents

Preface  i

1. On a good day  ii

2. Snap, Crackle and Pop.  15

3. The Straw That….  23

4. You want me to do what?  29

5. One potato, two potato….  58

6. Building, not burning, bridges.  61

7 The inaccessible short term memory  70

8 I/O  75

9 W.I.P.  78

ABOUT THE AUTHOR  83

This is not a work of fiction.

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